Ever wondered what it would be like to be out of your house , never having to listen to your parents yelling at you for something you didn’t do or wish that maybe you could make something of your life and have a awesome time building long lasting relationships with friends that love you no matter what …. Or maybe you are looking for a great way to learn more about God and grow spiritually or perhaps just are being forced to may that decision that will forever change the course of your life as you have to enter into the great wide real world.
It that is you then I challenge you to think about attending Houghton College in Western NY. It is a small Christian Liberal Arts College that will in fact change you life forever if you are blessed to attend. Four years ago I was likely just where you are at the end of Highschool dreading making that college decision, scared to leave friends and family and scared to grow up. I wanted to be able to come home if I needed it but I wanted to have the full experience of college, and all the exciting opportunities that came with it, sure there is the getting your diploma and that part but in searching for colleges I wanted a place to belong a place full of friends and love and chances to do all the things I dreamed of and a place that would launch me into my future. I knew as soon as I visited that Houghton was the place for me to do that and it has been. I have made the greatest friendships in the world that have gotten me through everything and ones I will forever cherish, I have learned so much yes academically as I took on three majors but also so much more as I have grown so much emotionally and spiritually and see things I would have never had the oppertunity to do at any other institution.
No matter what your major or life path I challange you to look into Houghton and consider this remarkable school I can give you all kinds of stories and reasons to attend but that would take all day but ask if you want to know or visit there site…
If you have considered Houghton and think it might be a place for you fill out an application ….If you do so by the December 30th you do so Free just mention my name….don’t worry I don’t work for Houghton I go here so this isn’t for my good this is for yours…..Thanks there is a link below to the application if you want to come to Houghton
Hey guys so here is our list for potential songs at the reception mostly ….lets just say we have that much more work to do on ceremony songs so if you have suggestions or want to let us know your favorites please do
First Dance
Faith Hill “There You’ll Be”
· Elton John “Your Song”
· Bryan Adams “Everything I Do I Do it for You”
· Jim and Martina Mc Bride “Valentine”
· Andy Griggs “She’s More”
· Righteous Brothers “Unchained Melody”
· Newsong “When God Made You”
· Steven Curtis Chapman “I Will Be Here”
· All-4-One “I Swear”
· Darlene Zschech “Everything About You”
· Mark Shultz “Walking Her Home”
· Scott Krippayne “May I Have this dance”
Brad Parsley “Then”
Father Daughter Dance
- Steven Curtus Chapman “Cinderella”
Mother Groom Dance
· Celine Dion: “Because You Loved Me”
· Kenny Rogers: “Through the Years”
· Rascal Flats “My Wish”
· Selah “You Raise me Up”
Other Dance Songs for the Reception
· Diana Ross “Stop in the Name of Love”
· Alison Kraus “When you Say Nothing at All”
· The Temptations “May I Have This Dance”
· The Carpenters “They Long to Be Close to You”
· The Everly Brothers “All I have to do is Dream”
· The Beatles “All my Loving”
· Buddy Holly “It’s So Easy”
· Etta James “At Last”
· Mariah Carey “Hero”
· Billy Joel “Just the Way You Are”
· Nat King Cole “Unforgetable”
· Anne Murray “Could I Have This Dance”
· Kenny Chesney “When I Close my Eyes”
· Berlin “Take My Breath Away”
· Shania Twain “Forever and For Always”
· Alabama “God Must have spent a little more time on you”
Hey guys so just thought I would update you all on our wedding planning thus far we have finally nailed down the date for August 7th 2010 (244 days away) …. So exciting. The wedding will be at Union Center Christian Church in Endicott Ny in the late afternoon followed by an evening reception at Donoli’s Restaurant in Apalachin, by invitation. I also got my dress!!! (finally) If you want pictures let me know and I will send some. But anyways we still have lots to cover and right now here are a few things we are looking for so let us know if you know someone that would be good or if you think you could help or ideas of any kind. Thanks.
D.J. (We are leaning towards United Sound, but if you think you would make a great one or know a great one we are open right now to things so let us know we also have access to equipment so that isn’t an issue)
Cake ( someone to make it or decorate a fake one )
Photographer (Leaning towards the not so professional side on this one just cause they are so pricey but would love it if you know anyone that loves taking pictures and takes good ones)
Decorations (Have ideas or willing to help let us know) Our colors are black and silver with some flowers yet to be decided upon.
Hey so Pat and I have finally set our date for August 7th 2010 with a small church wedding in Union Center Christian Church followed by and evening reception at Donolli’s Italian Restaurant in Apalachin Ny.
And on top of that on a recent dress shopping outing with my family and Sophia I think I have finally decided on the dress I have had my eye on since day one!!! Things are finally starting to come together Keep in touch as more is sure to come.
One of my absolute favorite things about summer time is the remarkable thunderstorms that come in. I can remember sitting out on a swing with my mom on top of the hill at my old house and watching as the storm would travel up the hill. It was such an incredible site and it was so cool that there I was watching it and I was still completely dry. Even as I baby I loved thunder, in fact the storms were just about the only thing that would get me to stop screaming. What can I say, I have never been normal. Hehe.
But back to the story on our way down to Rock Hill South Carolina from New York we were traveling near Harrisburg at about 10 at night when we are repeatedly irrupted with flashes of light. We pass the first couple off thinking some light was flashing up ahead but miles went by and the flashes got all the more persistent. We thought it was prolly heat lightning and both really began to enjoy the flashes as they lit up the sky revealing clouds that we did not even knew existed. The flashes continued to get more and more frequent and next thing we knew we were in really heavy rain, it became much more difficult to drive as the wipers could not even keep up. We then came down a big hill and where there was no place for the water to run off leaving huge puddles. It was one of the many areas where the road was under construction down to two lanes with a big wall to our right. While managing to get through all the puddles we noticed that the car right in front of us immediately swerved into the left lane. As it did we found out why, as another car was in front of it and had spun around right into the wall barrier. Pat instinctually swerved setting up a slid that would get us around to avoid a collision. However something incredible and very odd happen just after as the car was somehow knocked right out of gear at the perfect time which disabled all the automatic skid protection, which effectively saved our lives and got us around the car and into the left lane. Leaving us rather perplexed when we then tried to get up the hill then noticing that we were in neutral.
With our adrenaline to the max we attempted to phone in the accident to the cops. But the call did not go through despite having full service. Somehow the emergency tower was down. Then Pat suggested that this might not be heat lighting after if it is earth to ground lighting it would explain why the call would not go through. And just after that when we were pulling of the next exit a lightning bolt hit right in front of us only 300 yards away. With our questioned answered we still wanted to make sure everything was okay and after no one responded to the radio transmission we were going to pull over and try to get a hold of someone and then we noticed a sign that said the police station was right ahead. So we went there and had cops on there way to make sure everything was alright.
After we got back on the road with the storm still on us we saw several more lightning bolts as God was clearly putting on one great show. We even felt thunder coming from above us and rattle us a bit. It surely was an exciting night as the storm was actually traveling along with us as we latter found out. But was just a remarkable storm a little scarred then I may have liked but truly remarkable and I know God’s hand was on us to protect us. So on our way back from the wedding as we neared northern Virginia it surely sent chills down my back as the sky once again flashed with light and we both turned to each other and said oh boy here we go again.
My grandma recently informed me of a recent news story of a 4 year old girl named Halle and her story of being rushed to the ER one day after being severely lethargic and incoherent in her classroom, barely able to sit in her chair and could not hold her head up. After running blood test after blood test, x-rays and every test they could possibly think of the doctors were nearly stumped and had no idea what could possibly be wroung, as nothing seemd out of the ordinary. They decided to transfer her to a different hospital for further tests. However when they were leaving the teacher arrived and said that after questioning Halle’s classmates, she had found out that our little girl had licked liquiod hand sanitizer off her hands. They then told the ER doctor asked for them to check her blood alchol level. Yeah alchol level. The results showed her blood alcohol level was 85% – six hours after she had arrived at the hospital. Since then, her school and a few surrounding schools have taken the liquid hand sanitizers, as it turns out it only takes 3 squirts of the stuff ingested to fatal to a toddler. For her blood alcohol level to be so high, it would be like someone her size drinking120 proof liquor.
As next friday quickly approches I wanted to inform you all of the event of the millenium!!! Yes this coming firday August 7th 2009 at exactly 04: 05: 06 am. The time and date will be 04 :05: 06: 07: 08 :09. This is surely a reason to celebrate as such an insance will not happen even again until 3009. So set your alarm and be sure to keep this in mind. Haha…. just wanted to keep you informed.
So amist my resent crises of decision making I have realized that being married and even being engaged and truly understanding just what you are getting it too is hard whether you are able to see it just then or not. Which I know is mostly common knowledge but seriously you wouldn’t think that living and being blessed by having the person of your dreams for a lifetime would be that much of a challenge. I mean most people would kill for the kind of happiness and love experienced that makes people to come to the decision of marriage in the first place. Many wait there whole lives for that kind of special relationship and never find someone right or setting for someone they hope to be able to live with. But honestly if you find the one like the one that you can share and want to share everything with and one that understands and loves you entirely for who you are. One that respects your wishes and makes you feel loved every minute of everyday. One that wants the best for you even more than you do. Truly a knight in shinning armor or a princes entirely mystified by you in every way. Some one that has all the characteristics and qualities you could ever want and more. That kind of person. Tell me why is that so hard to love them and respect them and live with and for them forever no matter what. Just about everyone feels that way about their partner/ spouse when they get married but why are things so different in the not so distant future…..why do things get so much harder…..do people really change all that much? Or where they wrong?
I think it is none of that at all. Rather it is that they never knew what they were getting into. Sure you wanna be marred if that means lots of sex and fun and love and having someone that is always there for us and cleans up all our messes and pays our debts and helps us in everything. Well that is just not what marriage is….yeah that usually comes with the territory but you agree to marry someone it is for better or worse. That means you best be willing to comit the rest of your life to living for your spouse loving them in everyway imaginable, discovering everything about them and learning to show how much you care fufilling your biblical role in all of it. That means you have to clean up there messes take responsibility for them and love every moment of it. If you don’t going in to marriage thinking that you are in for a lot of trouble. This is not something you go into cause you are going to benifit in anyway. Marriage is for you to grow and it is something you enter in out of immence love for that person and a desire to serve, love and respect them every moment from that point alone to commit to them and dedicate you dreams and wishes for them. You sacrifice the rest cause you love them and you new goal and desire is souly to please him. I belevie that people fail to see how extreemly selfless you have to be to
So last week I was on my way home after visiting my grandmas on the first and most likely only day that it will actually feel like summer since it is so cold and crummy lately in particular. (Upstate New York for ya) But anyways it was truely one of those picture perfect summer days with lots of sunshine heat, swimming, lazing around, movies, the works. One of those days that makes you remember why you loved summer to begin with. And so as always there were lots of bugs out when it got dark, the time I was on my way back. And so as I drove down the country hills I heard what has to be my favorite sound in the whole world just about the entire ride back. That is the sound of nasty bugs dieing instantly as they smack right into your windshield!!! It just makes the trip all that more worth while knowing all the bugs you are killing. It is truely a glorious sounds as you know they will never again have the chance to bit you and cause that miserable iching. No you got them and there is no coming back for them and better yet you didn’t even have to try or be tormented by their presence. You were just drying on your way enjoying the warm summer night and the stars above and as you do there is the wonderful sound of splat all along the windshield……oh it is so incredible and I just had to share it with all of you.
So it is just that time of the summer just after the first of July as always when Houghton decides to give me the wonderful blessing of a bill for next semester, the very moment we all look forward too the true highlight of all or our summers I am sure. To top it off this time it came with a wonderful attached notice saying I was selected for income verification. Lucky me, I know you are all certainly jelious. The only bad news is that I happened to have already thrown out or terribly misplaced all of my W 2’s. Opps. Why doesn’t the government have that all on record anyways? Seems like they would know better than I, and after all why would I lie so that I am completely unable to get any federal aid? Makes no since to me.
So I get this bill and then I realize something and that is, not only do I have to worry and figure out this whole income verification business I also have to worry about the whole private loan jaz yet ago for even more than I had to last time around… And then it really hit me that this time next year I am going to have to start paying all of those loans back. And that really freaked me out I mean I was already on the whole what in the world I am going to do with my life. I mean the whole getting a job doing whatever that might be was starting to look realy good in comparision to having to move out and figure out where I was going to be living if I wanna get married right away and all that jaz…. I actually have to grow up! Man the real world is actually real, imagine that….somehow the last three years of loans and whatnot at Houghton really never sank in until this morning. It is like when you spend so so much it is so much easier to not really understand and just let it slip your mind. But I couldn’t really do that even with the impending physics final I had this afternoon. Cause I realized something and that is just the reality I am in…..and that penny pitching kinda seems silly incomparision to all the debt.
Then I got to thinking why did I do this in the first place. I mean I never did and certainly still don’t know what in the world I want to do and I deffinately didn’t have any major reason to going to school or to Houghton other than I thought that was what you were supposed to do after high school. After all I had straigt A’s all throughout highschool must be the right step is college and what better than a Houghton, everyone there was so nice and it was exactly the enviroment that I could have dreamed of living in. So although I am still really freaked out about all the loans I have to pay off and still unsure of what I want to do or if I will be able to find a job that is suited for me or one that I can live off of and hopefully help support a family off of, I realize that there are far more important things. And I remebered something that the last three years at Houghton has certaintly helped me drill into my head and experiance time after time and that is that God will always provide a way and that he knows far better than I do. I would never take back all the experiances I have had at Houghton, except maybe some of the Chemistry if you know what I mean…. But seriously Houghton has been so wonderful to me and I have learned so much that I am certian that I will forever take with me and use no matter what ends up happing in the future. As much as it may be hard to realize at times Houghton has and will continue to be the place for me and I am very greatful. And hopefully I have the faith and strentgh to really trust God with all my debt and help me find a good job.
So big bad future here I come watch out cause I have God on my side and loans you have nothing on him…..nothing…..ttfn
I don’t really know how to tell you this, but The mafia wants you. I think I realized it when I tripped on peanut butter outside the mental hospital and I saw you sit on my illegitimate child in Ghana. I’m sure you’re frostbitten enough to understand the middle-east is planning their revenge on you. I’m returning our matching snoopy underwear to you, but I’ll keep the results of that blood-sample as a memory. You should also know that I always will remember the pep talks and I’m scratching my butt as you read this.
Best of luck on your sex change,
Krista
Here’s how you do it:
Dear (someone you recently talked to),
I don’t really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and I saw you (4)(5). I’m sure you’re (6) enough to understand (7). I’m returning (8) to you, but I’ll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).
(12),
(Your name)
1) What’s the color of your shirt?
Blue – I’m in love with your cat
Red – Our affair is over
White – I’m joining the Convent
Black – Our romance is over
Green – Our socks don’t match
Grey – You’re a leprechaun
Yellow – I’m selling myself for candy
Pink – Your nostrils are insulting
Brown – The mafia wants you
No shirt – Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you
Other – I dislike your eyelashes
2) Which is your birth month?
January – That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forest Gump
March – When your dwarf bit me
April – When I tripped on peanut butter
May – When I finally changed my underwear
June – When you put cuffs on me
July – When I saw the purple monkey
August -When you smacked my butt
September – Last year when you peed your pants
October – When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November – When your dog humped my leg
December – When I threw up in your sock drawer
3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos – In your apartment
Chicken- In your car
Pasta – Outside of your office
Hamburgers – Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Lasagna – Outside the mental hospital
Kebab – With Jean Chrétien
Seafood – In your closet
Sandwiches – At the Elton John concert
Pizza – At the mental hospital
Hot dog – Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper
4) What’s the color of your socks?
Yellow – Ignore
Red – Put whipped cream on
Black – Hit on
Blue – Knock out
Purple – Pour syrup on
White – Carve your initials into
Grey – Pull the clothes off
Brown – bite off
Orange – Castrate
Pink – Pull the pants off of
Barefoot – Sit on
Other – Drive over
5) What’s the color of your underwear?
Black – My boyfriend
White – My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple – My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue – My salt-beef bucket
Yellow – My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange – My Blink 182 cd
Pink – Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
Other –The elephant in the corner
6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill – Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost – High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news – Scarred
American Idol – Masochistic
Family Guy – Open
Top Model – Middle-class
Annat -shamed
7) Your mood right now?
Happy – How awful you are
Sad – How boring you are
Bored – That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry – That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we’re related
Excited – That I may pee my pants
Nervous – The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried – That your Ford sucks
Apathetic – That you need a sex-change
Silly – That I’m allergic to your earlobes
Sleepy – That Santa doesn’t exist
Ashamed – That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other – That your driving sucks
What’s the color of your walls in your bedroom?
Grey – Your toe ring
Yellow – Your love letters to me
Red – The pictures from Vegas
Black – Your pet rock
Blue – The couch cushions
Green – Your car
Orange – Your false teeth
Brown – Your nose hair clippers
White – Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple – Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink – The cut toenails
Other – Your Hannah Montana underwear
9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B – Your neighbours dog
C/D – Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
E/F – My virginity
G/H – The oil tank from your car
I/J – Your left ear
K/L – The results of that blood-sample
M/N – Your glass eye
O/P – My common sense
Q/R – Your mom
S/T – Your collection of butterflies
U/V – Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z – Your credit cards
10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B – Love your sweet, sweet butt
C/D – Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L – Hate your cooking
M/N – Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P – Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R – Get sick when I think of your feet
S/T – Always wanted to break your legs
U/V – Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X – Am better off without you
Y/Z – haven’t showered in a month
11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk – The apartment building is on fire
Water – I’m scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey – I love Oprah Winfrey
Beer – I threw up yesterday
Other – you should stop picking your nose
12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Greetings to your frog, Leonard
Australia – best of luck on the sex change
France – Love always
Spain – With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don’t hurt me
Japan – Go milk a cow
Greece – Your everlasting enemy
USA – Warm tingly sensations
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England – Go drown
It begins with a bite, a painless bite. The mosquito comes in the night, alights on an exposed patch of flesh, and assumes the hunched, head-lowered posture of a sprinter in the starting blocks. Then she plunges her stiletto mouthparts into the skin.
The mosquito has long, filament-thin legs and dappled wings; she’s of the genus Anopheles, the only insect capable of harboring the human malaria parasite. And she’s definitely a she: Male mosquitoes have no interest in blood, while females depend on protein-rich hemoglobin to nourish their eggs. A mosquito’s proboscis appears spike-solid, but it’s actually a sheath of separate tools—cutting blades and a feeding tube powered by two tiny pumps. She drills through the epidermis, then through a thin layer of fat, then into the network of blood-filled micro-capillaries. She starts to drink.
To inhibit the blood from coagulating, the mosquito oils the bite area with a spray of saliva. This is when it happens. Carried in the mosquito’s salivary glands—and entering the body with the lubricating squirt—are minute, wormlike creatures. These are the one-celled malaria parasites, known as plasmodia. Fifty thousand of them could swim in a pool the size of the period at the end of this sentence. Typically, a couple of dozen slip into the bloodstream. But it takes just one. A single plasmodium is enough to kill a person.
The parasites remain in the bloodstream for only a few minutes. They ride the flume of the circulatory system to the liver. There they stop. Each plasmodium burrows into a different liver cell. Almost certainly, the person who has been bitten hardly stirs from sleep. And for the next week or two, there’s no overt sign that something in the body has just gone horribly wrong.
We live on a malarious planet. It may not seem that way from the vantage point of a wealthy country, where malaria is sometimes thought of, if it is thought of at all, as a problem that has mostly been solved, like smallpox or polio. In truth, malaria now affects more people than ever before. It’s endemic to 106 nations, threatening half the world’s population. In recent years, the parasite has grown so entrenched and has developed resistance to so many drugs that the most potent strains can scarcely be controlled. This year malaria will strike up to a half billion people. At least a million will die, most of them under age five, the vast majority living in Africa. That’s more than twice the annual toll a generation ago.
So being a college student taking way too many credits and working too many hours I and being in the rare group of not actually likeing caffinated beverages I have had to come up with my own ways to pull all nighters and some how get the mounds of work accomplished before me…. So I decided to finally let my secret out…and that is there is none…. Just a whole lot of faith and an amazing God that somehow makes everything work out in the end. But for our part here are 50 ways I found to boost our energy levels without cafeen that we all so often rely on…
While many people find caffeinated beverages to be an easy way to wake up in the morning or anytime during the day when sluggishness strikes, the reality is that while caffeine does offer some benefits, it can have a lot of negative side effects as well. When you come to rely on caffeine to get going you can experience many symptoms of withdrawal if you don’t get your daily fix. Some of these symptoms include headaches, irritability and even an upset stomach. Why deal with all that when there are other ways to boost your energy that don’t require any help from caffeine? Try out some of these suggestions to give you a boost when you’re feeling sleepy or to prevent tiredness altogether.
Basics
Give these basic techniques a try for increased energy throughout the day.
Turn on the lights. Your body responds naturally to changes in light, so if it’s unnaturally dark where you’re working or sleeping it may make staying alert a lot harder. Try keeping your blinds open a bit so you’ll wake up naturally in the morning or adding a few extra lights to your workspace to keep you from feeling sleepy throughout the day.
Get more sleep at night. Many people try to get by on a lot less sleep than they really need. While each person’s needs will differ, 7-8 hours a night is a good goal, and will help you feel more rested and better able to concentrate on anything throughout the day.
Examine your emotions. Stress, depression and other negative emotions can take a heavy toll on your energy levels. Your exhaustion may have a lot to do with how you’re feeling mentally, so take the time to deal with your emotions or get help if you need it.
Exercise. While it may seem counterintuitive, exercising can wake you up and give you an energy boost that lasts all day. Make time for even 30 minutes of exercise in your day and start reaping the benefits.
Get a physical. There are many illnesses, some serious and some not, that can cause drops in energy and cause you to be chronically sluggish. Take a trip to your doctor if you’re feeling run down on a regular basis to see if you may have a condition like mono, an underactive thyroid, or anemia.
Keep a sleep schedule. Our bodies enjoy consistency, so by keeping yourself on a regular sleep schedule you may be able to wake up more easily in the mornings and get to sleep more quickly at night, making you more rested in the long run.
Find things to get excited about. Of course you’re going to be exhausted in the morning if all you can think about doing is things you dread. Try to find at least one thing you can get excited about doing each day, even if it’s just making your favorite lunch or meeting with a friend after work.
Don’t linger in bed. Hitting the snooze button in the morning may delay the inevitable time when you do have to get up, but it’s not doing you any favors in the long run. Challenge yourself to get up and move around for at least 10 minutes to see if you’re still super tired. Chances are, once you get up you’ll be ready to start your day.
Wake up gradually. For some, the transition between sleep and the horrible beep of the alarm clock can create a drowsy and negative day thereafter. If your alarm tends to wake you with a start, try employing a method to wake yourself more gradually like beeps that get progressively louder or your favorite radio station.
Don’t focus on the negative. Being a pessimist may actually be making you more tired. Try looking on the positive side of things instead, and you may see a turn around in your energy levels.
Try something new. Getting into a rut can make your day seem boring and tedious and drain your energy levels. Change things up, try new things and seek out new experiences to spice up your day a little and keep you alert and awake.
Watch your attitude. If you let the bad things that happen during your day get you down, you’re bound to start feeling worn out. Watch your attitude and make sure you’re not letting yourself be overly negative.
Diet
What you choose to put into your body can make a huge difference in how energetic you feel, so check out these tips for ways to give yourself a boost.
Eat smaller, more frequent meals. Eating meals that are infrequent can cause your blood glucose to spike and crash, leaving you tired and hungry. And digesting huge meals can steal energy you need for other things. Instead, eat smaller meals throughout the day so you can keep your energy level and keep yourself feeling great.
Have an apple. Eating fruits can be a great way to get a quick energy boost. Fruits are more easily digestible than many other foods and can give the fuel you need to get going.
Drink enough water. Because your body is mostly composed of water, it makes sense that you need to get enough in order to function at your peak. Try to drink the standard 8 glasses a day to keep your brain and body in tip top shape.
Try whole grains. Complex carbs like those found in whole grains take longer for your body to break down and can be a good way to keep your energy levels steady all day.
Have a healthy snack. Instead of reaching for a sugary snack, eat something healthy instead. It’ll give you more energy for the long haul instead of just a quick boost, and you’ll be healthier overall.
Consider herbal supplements. Many people swear by herbs that are purported to improve energy levels. If you’re looking for a natural way to stay awake, try supplements of ginseng, bee pollen, gutu kola, maitake and more.
Don’t skip breakfast. Breakfast really is the most important meal of the day, at least in terms of energy. Having a good, well-rounded meal in the morning will help wake you up and keep you fueled for the rest of the day.
Take your vitamins. Making sure your body has all the vitamins it needs to function properly is integral to staying energetic. If your diet isn’t providing what you need, consider a multi-vitamin to supplement.
Avoid excess sugar. Sugar may be tasty, but it can also cause your energy levels to bottom out after it’s been digested. Avoid eating super sugary foods when you need to be at your peak energy levels.
Eat enough alkaline-forming foods. Foods are classified as alkaline or acidic forming based on its affect on your urine ph. Foods that are alkaline like fruits and vegetables are thought to be energy boosters, so try to consume more of these than their acidic counterparts.
Cut down on alcohol. Alcohol may appear to make you sleepy, but it can actually ensure that you get a much lower quality of sleep than you would otherwise. Keep it in moderation so it won’t affect your sleep and make you groggy the next day.
Make sure you are getting enough protein. Protein is an important part of a balanced diet and not getting enough can leave you feeling wiped out.
Grab a handful of nuts. Whether you like almonds, cashews, peanuts or walnuts, nuts can be one of the best sources for a quick energy boost. Or if you don’t have nuts on hand, try peanut butter instead.
At Home
Try these tips at home when you need a jumpstart to your day.
Take a short nap. When you’ve got the time at home and you’re feeling run down, why not take a little nap? Short naps can give you the rest you need to be more alert. Just make sure not to sleep for too long or you may end up feeling even more drowsy than you did before the nap.
Do some simple chores. If you’re having trouble getting motivated to do a big project because you feel tired, try starting out with a few simple household chores. The activity will help you wake up and feel more up to getting what you need to do done.
Wake up your mind. Sometimes it takes awhile to get your mind going in the morning. Try waking up by reading the news or doing a crossword.
Meditate and relax. Meditation can be a great and effective way to recharge throughout the day. Set aside a few minutes of your day to relax and let your worries go.
Take a walk. Whether you go just around the block or a few miles, taking a walk can help wake you up, clear your thoughts and maybe even improve your mood.
Get out of the house. Sunlight can help wake you up and help you stay up, so take a trip outside to catch some rays and get some fresh air.
Take a shower. Get your brain and body feeling fresh and awakened by taking a quick shower.
Indulge yourself. Giving into your cravings, enjoying a nice long bath, or simply relaxing on your patio can help refresh you and give you the energy to keep going.
Call a friend. What better way to wake up than by interacting with those you care most about? Give a friend or a family member a call to see what they’ve been up to.
Get acupuncture or a massage. Many forms of acupuncture and massage have been shown to help relieve stress and boost energy overall. If you have the time, why not try it out and see if it gives you the wake up you need?
Try aromatherapy. Certain smells like citrus, ginger and peppermint can have an energizing effect and help to boost your alertness. Light a candle or try a perfume infused with these scents to help you feel extra energized.
Play with a pet. Spending time with your furry friend can not only be fun, it can also make you feel happier and more energetic. Whether you decide to play in the park with your dog or tempt your cat with a string, make playing with pets a daily part of your energy routine.
At Work
Work can be exhausting, but you don’t have to let it ruin your energy levels. Try these tips instead.
Get away from your desk. Hours upon hours of sitting at your desk can start to sap your energy and make you plead for it to be 5 o’clock already. Give yourself a quick pick-me-up by stepping away from your desk for a bit for a trip to the water fountain, a walk around the office or just a short break.
Talk to a coworker. Boost your mood and your energy by connecting with your coworkers. Social interaction can help wake you up, especially if you’re doing tedious work, and give you the pep you need to go on.
Have a laugh. While the Internet’s plentiful humor sites are prime territory for distraction and procrastination, they can also be a great place to get a morale and energy boost. Laughter will make you feel better mentally and physically and ensure that you don’t end up asleep at your desk.
Do desk yoga. Yoga boasts many positions that are designed to improve the energy flow in your body and help you feel more alert. Check out the net for versions of these poses you can even do at work for a quick boost.
Listen to your favorite up-tempo songs. If you can listen to music at work, why not put on some tunes that will get your heart pumping and make you want to dance? It’s a surefire way to beat the mid-afternoon slump.
Start work with a challenging task. Get your brain in gear by giving it a challenging task first thing. You’ll be more alert and you’ll get the hard stuff out of the way so the rest of your day will be a breeze.
Stop slouching. Slumping down at your desk isn’t doing you any favors in the alertness category. Sitting up at your desk, in an ergonomically friendly way, can make you feel more alert and ready to work.
Volunteer to help someone. Studies have shown that helping others actually gives the helper a sense of elation and excitement, and at work it can show a lot of initiative while helping you stay awake.
Avoid coworkers who sap your energy. Everyone has that one coworker who is so glum, negative or boring that they just suck the energy right out of you. When it’s possible, keep this person away from you to save your energy and maybe your sanity too.
Stock your desk with high energy snacks. Don’t make it easier to eat unhealthy food just because you’re at work. Bring nuts, dried fruits and other healthy snacks to work in place of sugary or fatty counterparts from the vending machine.
Have a mint. For some people, the smell and taste of mint helps wake them up. Give it a try next time you’re feeling drowsy. Even if you still feel sleepy at least you’ll have fresh breath.
Get some sunlight. If it’s possible, try taking a break from your desk to get outside. Getting sunlight and fresh air can help make you feel more awake and maybe even put you in a better mood.
Look at your accomplishments. When you’ve got a lot on your plate at work, it can be easy to get overwhelmed and start feeling down on yourself and exhausted. Instead of looking at the bad side of things, try thinking about all the things you have gotten done. It will improve your mood and give you the energy to go on.
Dihydrogen Monoxide (DHMO) is a colorless and odorless chemical compound, also referred to by some as Dihydrogen Oxide, Hydrogen Hydroxide, Hydronium Hydroxide, or simply Hydric acid. Its basis is the highly reactive hydroxyl radical, a species shown to mutate DNA, denature proteins, disrupt cell membranes, and chemically alter critical neurotransmitters. The atomic components of DHMO are found in a number of caustic, explosive and poisonous compounds such as Sulfuric Acid, Nitroglycerine and Ethyl Alcohol.
For more detailed information, including precautions, disposal procedures and storage requirements, refer to one of the Material Safety Data Sheets (MSDS) available for DHMO:
Yes, you should be concerned about DHMO! Although the U.S. Government and the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) do not classify Dihydrogen Monoxide as a toxic or carcinogenic substance (as it does with better known chemicals such as hydrochloric acid and benzene), DHMO is a constituent of many known toxic substances, diseases and disease-causing agents, environmental hazards and can even be lethal to humans in quantities as small as a thimbleful.
Research conducted by award-winning U.S. scientist Nathan Zohner concluded that roughly 86 percent of the population supports a ban on dihydrogen monoxide. Although his results are preliminary, Zohner believes people need to pay closer attention to the information presented to them regarding Dihydrogen Monoxide. He adds that if more people knew the truth about DHMO then studies like the one he conducted would not be necessary.
A similar study conducted by U.S. researchers Patrick K. McCluskey and Matthew Kulick also found that nearly 90 percent of the citizens participating in their study were willing to sign a petition to support an outright ban on the use of Dihydrogen Monoxide in the United States.
Why haven’t I heard about Dihydrogen Monoxide before?
Good question. Historically, the dangers of DHMO, for the most part, have been considered minor and manageable. While the more significant dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide are currently addressed by a number of agencies including FDA, FEMA and CDC, public awareness of the real and daily dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide is lower than some think it should be.
Critics of government often cite the fact that many politicians and others in public office do not consider Dihydrogen Monoxide to be a “politically beneficial” cause to get behind, and so the public suffers from a lack of reliable information on just what DHMO is and why they should be concerned.
Part of the blame lies with the public and society at large. Many do not take the time to understand Dihydrogen Monoxide, and what it means to their lives and the lives of their families.
Unfortunately, the dangers of DHMO have increased as world population has increased, a fact that the raw numbers and careful research both bear out. Now more than ever, it is important to be aware of just what the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide are and how we can all reduce the risks faced by ourselves and our families.
What are some of the dangers associated with DHMO?
Each year, Dihydrogen Monoxide is a known causative component in many thousands of deaths and is a major contributor to millions upon millions of dollars in damage to property and the environment. Some of the known perils of Dihydrogen Monoxide are:
Death due to accidental inhalation of DHMO, even in small quantities.
Prolonged exposure to solid DHMO causes severe tissue damage.
Excessive ingestion produces a number of unpleasant though not typically life-threatening side-effects.
DHMO is a major component of acid rain.
Gaseous DHMO can cause severe burns.
Contributes to soil erosion.
Leads to corrosion and oxidation of many metals.
Contamination of electrical systems often causes short-circuits.
Exposure decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes.
Found in biopsies of pre-cancerous tumors and lesions.
Given to vicious dogs involved in recent deadly attacks.
Often associated with killer cyclones in the U.S. Midwest and elsewhere, and in hurricanes including deadly storms in Florida, New Orleans and other areas of the southeastern U.S.
Thermal variations in DHMO are a suspected contributor to the El Nino weather effect.
What are some uses of Dihydrogen Monoxide?
Despite the known dangers of DHMO, it continues to be used daily by industry, government, and even in private homes across the U.S. and worldwide. Some of the well-known uses of Dihydrogen Monoxide are:
as an industrial solvent and coolant,
in nuclear power plants,
by the U.S. Navy in the propulsion systems of some older vessels,
by elite athletes to improve performance,
in the production of Styrofoam,
in biological and chemical weapons manufacture,
in the development of genetically engineering crops and animals,
as a spray-on fire suppressant and retardant,
in so-called “family planning” or “reproductive health” clinics,
as a major ingredient in many home-brewed bombs,
as a byproduct of hydrocarbon combustion in furnaces and air conditioning compressor operation,
in cult rituals,
by the Church of Scientology on their members and their members’ families (although surprisingly, many members recently have contacted DHMO.org to vehemently deny such use),
by both the KKK and the NAACP during rallies and marches,
by members of Congress who are under investigation for financial corruption and inappropriate IM behavior,
by the clientele at a number of bath houses in New York City and San Francisco,
historically, in Hitler’s death camps in Nazi Germany, and in prisons in Turkey, Serbia, Croatia, Libya, Iraq and Iran,
in World War II prison camps in Japan, and in prisons in China, for various forms of torture,
during many recent religious and ethnic wars in the Middle East,
by many terrorist organizations including al Quaeda,
What you may find surprising are some of the products and places where DHMO is used, but which for one reason or another, are not normally made part of public presentations on the dangers to the lives of our family members and friends. Among these startling uses are:
as an additive to food products, including jarred baby food and baby formula, and even in many soups, carbonated beverages and supposedly “all-natural” fruit juices
in cough medicines and other liquid pharmaceuticals,
in spray-on oven cleaners,
in shampoos, shaving creams, deodorants and numerous other bathroom products,
in bathtub bubble products marketed to children,
as a preservative in grocery store fresh produce sections,
in the production of beer by all the major beer distributors,
in the coffee available at major coffee houses in the US and abroad,
in Formula One race cars, although its use is regulated by the Formula One Racing Commission, and
as a target of ongoing NASA planetary and stellar research.
One of the most surprising facts recently revealed about Dihydrogen Monoxide contamination is in its use as a food and produce “decontaminant.” Studies have shown that even after careful washing, food and produce that has been contaminated by DHMO remains tainted by DHMO.
What is the link between Dihydrogen Monoxide and school violence?
A recent stunning revelation is that in every single instance of violence in our country’s schools, including infamous shootings in high schools in Denver and Arkansas, Dihydrogen Monoxide was involved. In fact, DHMO is often very available to students of all ages within the assumed safe confines of school buildings. None of the school administrators with which we spoke could say for certain how much of the substance is in use within their very hallways.
How does Dihydrogen Monoxide toxicity affect kidney dialysis patients?
Unfortunately, DHMO overdose is not unheard of in patients undergoing dialysis treatments for kidney failure. Dihydrogen Monoxide overdose in these patients can result in congestive heart failure, pulmonary edema and hypertension. In spite of the danger of accidental overdose and the inherent toxicity of DHMO in large quantities for this group, there is a portion of the dialysis treated population that continues to use DHMO on a regular basis.
Are there groups that oppose a ban on Dihydrogen Monoxide?
In spite of overwhelming evidence, there is one group in California that opposes a ban on Dihydrogen Monoxide. The Friends of Hydrogen Hydroxide is a group that believes that the dangers of DHMO have been exaggerated. Members claim that Dihydrogen Monoxide, or the less emotionally charged and more chemically accurate term they advocate for it, “Hydrogen Hydroxide,” is beneficial, environmentally safe, benign and naturally occurring. They argue that efforts to ban DHMO are misguided.Friends of Hydrogen Hydroxide is supported by the Scorched Earth Party, a radical and loosely-organized California-based group. Sources close to the Scorched Earth Party deny any outside funding from government, industry or pro-industry PACs.
Has the press ignored this web site and the Dihydrogen Monoxide problem?
For the most part, the press has not reported on the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide as much as some would like. Although many private individuals have put up web sites in a major grassroots effort to spread the word, major publications have not.
Recently, attention has been paid to the subject thanks to an incident in Aliso Viejo, California. This so-called Aliso Viejo Incident was widely reported in the media, although the director of DHMO.org, Dr. Tom Way, was called a “prankster.” Once the Associated Press started circulating the story, it became fact, and the valuable information being provided by the DHMO.org website was deemed to be “rubbish” rather than an honest and unbiased recounting of facts about a dangerous, life-endangering chemical compound.
If you are a member of the press, you may access our online Press Kit. See the main page for access information. This resource is for members of the press only.
Is it true that using DHMO improves athletic performance?
Absolutely! With the numerous allegations of amateur and professional athletes using anabolic steroids and/or blood doping to enhance performance, virtually no attention has been paid to the performance enhancing properties of Dihydrogen Monoxide. It is perhaps the sporting world’s dirtiest of dirty little secrets that athletes regularly ingest large quantities of DHMO in an effort to gain a competitive edge over an opponent.
One technique commonly used by endurance athletes in sports such as distance running and cycling is to take a large amount of DHMO immediately prior to a race. This is known within racing circles to dramatically improve performance.
Sports-medicine physicians warn that ingesting too much Dihydrogen Monoxide can lead to complications and unwanted side-effects, but do acknowledge the link to improved performance. DHMO is not currently considered a banned substance, so post-race urine tests do not detect elevated or abnormal levels of DHMO.
Can using DHMO improve my marriage?
This is a popular myth, but one which is also actually supported by a number of scientific facts. Dihydrogen Monoxide plays an instrumental role in the centers of the brain associated with feelings of emotional attachment and love. Married couples have found that regular ingestion of DHMO can improve their marriage-related activities, while couples that never ingest DHMO often find that their marriage suffers as well.
What are the symptoms of accidental Dihydrogen Monoxide overdose?
You may not always recognize that you have been a victim of accidental DHMO overdose, so here are some signs and symptoms to look for. If you suspect Dihydrogen Monoxide overdose, or if you exhibit any of these symptoms, you should consult with your physician or medical practitioner. The data presented here is provided for informational purposes only, and should in no way be construed as medical advice of any sort.
Watch for these symptoms:
Excessive sweating
Excessive urination
Bloated feeling
Nausea
Vomiting
Electrolyte imbalance
Hyponatremia (serum hypotonicity)
Dangerously imbalanced levels of ECF and ICF in the blood
Degeneration of sodium homeostasis
A recently noted medical phenomenon involves small amounts of DHMO leaking or oozing from the corners of the eyes as a direct result of causes such as foreign particulate irritation, allergic reactions including anaphylactic shock, and sometimes severe chemical depression.
What is a chemical analysis of Dihydrogen Monoxide
Recently, German analytical chemist Christoph von Bueltzingsloewen at the Universitaet Regensburg identified what may be key reasons why the dangers of DHMO are ever present. According to von Bueltzingsloewen, the chemical separation of dihydrogenoxide from the hazardous oxygendihydride is extremely difficult. The two similar compounds curiously occur in nearly equimolar distribution wherever they are found. It is not clear how the two contribute directly to the dangers inherent in Dihydrogen Monoxide, although von Bueltzingsloewen believes that a synergetic mechanism, catalyzed by traces of hydrogenhydroxide, plays a major role.
What can I do to minimize the risks?
Fortunately, there is much you can do to minimize your dangers due to Dihydrogen Monoxide exposure. First, use common sense. Whenever you are dealing with any product or food that you feel may be contaminated with DHMO, evaluate the relative danger to you and your family, and act accordingly. Keep in mind that in many instances, low-levels of Dihydrogen Monoxide contamination are not dangerous, and in fact, are virtually unavoidable. Remember, the responsibility for your safety and the safety of your family lies with you.
Second, exercise caution when there is the potential for accidental inhalation or ingestion of DHMO. If you feel uncomfortable, remove yourself from a dangerous situation. Better safe than sorry.
Third, don’t panic. Although the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide are very real, by exercising caution and common sense, you can rest assured knowing that you are doing everything possible to keep you and your family safe.
How can I find out more about Dihydrogen Monoxide?
We would be happy to tell you more about DHMO! Send us email
, and we’ll gladly attempt to keep you up-to-date on current developments in the study of Dihydrogen Monoxide, its uses and misuses.
There are a number of sites on the world wide web that contain more information on DHMO and related topics. It should be noted that we do not endorse these sites, nor do we control their content or political bias.
You need a hydrocarbon with a halide
Treat it in ether with magnesium
And when you want an alcohol, you start right here
Just take a carbonyl, oh a carbonyl, and soon what you’ll have is
An alcohol
Primary, Secondary, Tertiary, oh yeah
Hey, go attack formaldehyde, for primary
Or maybe you can use an aldehyde, secondary
But then there’s always ketone, oh yeah then tertiary
It don’t matter what you choose, for alcohol
take a carbonyl and that reagent
You always get an alcohol, Grignard reagent
Whenever you get started, all you need is that
M A G N E S I U M, oh M A G N E S I U M
First take a hydrocarbon with a halide
Treat it in ether with magnesium
And when you want an alcohol, you start right here
Just take a carbonyl, oh a carbonyl, and soon what you’ll have is
An alcohol
Forming carbon carbon bonds ain’t hard, all you need
Just watch what halide, don’t take fluoro
Give me bromo, iodo, or chloro, they all work
But there ain’t no F’s in my Grignard
You don’t need no special bonds or overlapping orbitals
A little halogenated alkyl group
Magnesium, carbon bonding, and protonation
And soon you’ll see you’ve formed a carbon bond and lost a salt
All you needed was a Grignard reagent
Application of a Grignard reagent
Characters: The characters include the Primary (Prim 1) and Secondary Carbon (Sec) of a propene, the Primary Carbons (Prim 2, 3) of two other propenes, the alluring Boron (Bor) and its three Hydrogens (Hyd), the evil Peroxide ion with its Oxygen (Ox 1), and the water molecule, with its Oxygen (Ox 2).
Sec: (Sigh) I’m a little tired of this pi bond, aren’t you? Prim 1: Yes, it is a bit of a strain. Sec. What we need is a nice pair of little hydrogens. Then we could settle down with some comfortable sp3 orbitals and enjoy the bliss of saturation. Prim 1: (Seeing the borane) Look at that! What kind of atom is that?? Sec. Why, that’s a boron! You don’t see too many of those. Prim 1: Just look at that nucleus! I would share electrons with that any day! Sec: Just a sextet of electrons, and Boron can barely even hold on to them. Those hydrogens are practically ripping those electrons away. Can you imagine? Prim 1: (to Boron) Hey, you cutie! Look what we’ve got. (Carbons wave their electrons at the Boron, who drifts over.) Bor: Nice electrons, carbons. Prim 1: Bond with me, gorgeous. Bor: I’m not really interested in bonding right now, but I would like to get to know you better. (Boron sidles up close to Prim. Primary pulls the shared electrons closer to itself, leaving Sec a little bit delta positive.) Sec: Hey, you two! Don’t take all the electrons. I feel naked. Hyd: You look positively marvelous! Here, take my electrons. (Hydrogen yanks its shared electrons away from Boron and thrusts them at Secondary, who grabs them, at the same time letting go of one of the electron pairs shared with Primary. At the same instant, Primary hands the newly released electron pair to Boron, who takes it.) Prim 1: Got you! Bor: No, I got you! Sec: Hello, Hydrogen. Do you like my orbitals? I was just saying to my bond-mate here, ‘What we need is a cute little hydrogen to bond with,’ that’s what I was saying. And here you are! Hyd: Do you always talk this much? Sec: It excites me when I hybridize my orbitals. Bor: Well, that’s one. Now for another one. (Seeing another propene:) Hi, carbons! Prim 1: What do you need them for when you’ve got me? Bor: Well, in case you haven’t noticed, I still have nothing but a sextet. You may be satisfied, but I’m not! (The second propene approaches.) Nice electrons, carbons. Prim 2: What are you doing with that propane? It doesn’t have anything to offer you. Bor: No, but you do! Let me just admire your electrons. (Prim 2 starts to reach for Boron.) No, no, you naughty carbon. No bonding! (Boron’s second Hydrogen jumps to the second propene, and Boron ends up bonded to Prim 2.) Prim 2: (satisfied) How do you like those electrons? Bor: Very nice! Now all I need is one more. Prim 1: I don’t like this. There’s something screwy going on around here. Bor: (to 3rd propene) Hi, there, you big hunk of electrophile bait! Prim 2: Hey, what’s with you? Two propanes aren’t enough for you? Bor: You’re all used up, and I’m still not satisfied. Prim 3: Nice nucleus, boron! What are you doing hanging on to those two lumps of hydrocarbon? Bor: Oh, they’re nothing. It’s you I want. Prim 3: Well, take a grab of these electrons. Bor: No, I don’t actually want to bond… Prim 1 and Prim 2: Don’t believe it! Watch out for that Hydrogen! Bor: Too late! (Boron’s last hydrogen hops over to the third propene, and Boron grabs Prim 3’s electrons.) Now I’ve got you, you three suckers! (Boron shouts to someone offstage:) You can come in now. I’ve got them! (A peroxide ion and a water molecule come in.) Prim 3: Oh, no! It’s… it’s a peroxide! They shed oxygens the way children shed lice! Prim 2: We’re doomed. I don’t like bonding with oxygens. They are the worst electron hogs! (The peroxide molecule advances on the organoborane.) Bor: In here, Oxygen. (Boron grabs Oxygen 1 and puts it between itself and Prim 1. Boron then grabs the remaining hydroxide molecule.) Ox 1: Hello, pal! Nice electrons. Don’t expect to see much of them! Heh, heh! Bor: Hurry up, water! Get this over with. I don’t like having a negative charge! (Oxygen 2 from the water hands its hydrogen over to Oxygen 1, keeping the electrons. Oxygen 1 immediately lets go of Boron.) Ox 2: What’s in this for me, I’d like to know? Bor: Just stick around. You’ll get your chance. (The organoborane and the left-over hydroxide exit in a struggling huddle.) Sec: Look at us. We’re a lousy propanol. I never thought I’d see the day when I would be part of an alcohol molecule. Hyd: I’d rather be bonded to you than to that rotten Boron. I tried pulling my electrons away, but I couldn’t quite do it. Prim 1: That was a set-up. We were tricked. Ox 1: Yup, that handsome little Boron does the trick every time. Prim 3: Who would have thought that a cute little electrophile like that would be so wicked? Led us right straight into the gutter! Ox 1: Yeah, and the Boron got me the Primary Carbon, no less! It’s the best system I know. Gets around that old Markovnikov rule. Sec: (huffy) But really! I was still almost a carbocation! Ox 1: Who cares? I’m happy. Let’s go contaminate some ethanol!
Characters: Two sp2-hybridized Carbon Atoms (Carb 1 and Carb 2) in a cyclopentene are hanging out in the solvent waiting for their blind date. Presently they see a bromine molecule approaching, made up of two Bromine Atoms (Brom 1 and Brom 2).
Carb 1: What’s that molecule over there? Is that our date? Carb 2: I don’t know. I hope not. It looks like a halogen. Carb 1: Yeah, it does look like a halogen. Ugh, it’s a pair of fat bromines! Carb 2: I know they’re supposed to be great electrophiles, but I can’t see what they have to offer us. I mean, look at that! They may have great nuclei, but they’re buried under layers and layers of electrons. Carb 1: Yeah, maybe they are electrophiles, but I am a nucleophile and I’m not seeing any nucleus! Brom 1: (Catching sight of the cyclopentene) Oh, look, that must be our date. Brom 2: Hmm. Not a bad electron density for a pair of carbons. Brom 1: (Giggling) They’re pi bonded. Kinky! Brom 2: They don’t look too happy to see us. What if they refuse to share those lovely electrons? Brom 1: Don’t worry. I know how to handle carbons. Here, you let me hold most of these electrons while I stand out of sight behind you and you pretend to be a cation. Brom 2: A cation?!? Just what kind of halogen do you think I am? Brom 1: Hey, it’s just temporary! It will only be until you grab hold of some of those great electrons. And that’s what we’re in this for, isn’t it? Electrons? Brom 2: Yeah, I guess you’re right. (Bromine 1 stands behind Bromine 2, while Bromine 2 reluctantly lets Bromine 1 carry most of the electrons.) Ugh, this feels nasty. Carb 2: Hey, they’re coming toward us. Carb 1: Yeah, and you know, the closer they get, the better they look! Carb 2: Yeah, that one in front is not nearly as fat as I thought at first. In fact, that one looks pretty darn good. Brom 2: Hello, carbons! May I have a piece of your pi? (Bromine 2 waggles its nucleus at the carbons.) I have 35 protons! (Bromine 2 tosses its electrons back to Bromine 1 at the same time as both of the carbons lunge out and grab Bromine 2.) Carb 1 and Carb 2: (Fighting over Bromine 2) Yeah, come here! I’ll take this one. Step aside; you bother me! My bromine! My protons! Keep your electrons off! You can have the other one! Brom 2: Carbons! Carbons! I love you both dearly, but one of you will have to let go! This is simply not comfortable. I feel altogether too positive with my electrons spread out between two of you. Carb 1: (to Carb 2) You let go! Bromine doesn’t have enough charge for me with you hogging half of it! Carb 2: Why should I be the one to let go? I don’t want to be a carbocation! Carb 1: Well, why should I be the carbocation? I’m a secondary carbon the same as you! Brom 2: Will one of you please let go?!? Brom 1: (to Bromine 2) Hey, Bro, if you let go of one of them, I’ll grab it. Brom 2: I can’t let go! They won’t let me! Save me! (Bromine 1 tries to come in but can’t get near enough to the carbons to help because Bromine 2 is in the way.) Brom 1: Move your fat orbitals! Brom 2: I can’t! Try coming at them from behind. (Bromine 1 goes behind the cyclopentene.) Brom 1: Okay, Carbon. I’m right behind you. Let go of my Twin and grab me. Carb 2: No! No! No! I don’t want to be a carbocation! Brom 1: You won’t be a carbocation, you idiot. We’ll do a nucleophilic substitution. Just grab a pair of my electrons and let go of my Twin’s electrons at the same time, and you’ll be okay. (Carbon 2 does this.) Brom 2: Oh, that’s much better. Well, here we are, a cycloalkyl bromide! Carb 2: Excuse me, but we’re more of a bromocycloalkane. Brom 1: (scornfully) Oh, goody, an IUPAC perfectionist. Brom 2: Gosh, do you realize we were a bromonium ion just for a little while there? I was in a bromonium ion! Brom 1: That’s not something I would let get about, especially to other halogens. They might think you have a thing for a low electron density. You should just be quiet about it. You never know where there might be some chlorine lurking about. Brom 2: (Looking anxiously over its shoulder) Oh, you can’t scare me, you fat chunk of fluorine bait. Brom 1: Boy, am I glad this is a trans arrangement. Carb 1: Will you two settle down? We wouldn’t have bonded with you if we had known you were so energetic!
What’s the color of your walls in your bedroom?
One technique commonly used by endurance athletes in sports such as distance running and cycling is to take a large amount of DHMO immediately prior to a race. This is known within racing circles to dramatically improve performance.
